Call Me Crazy
by SiRiUsLyPaDfOoTeD
Summary: /SLASH/ /Sirius' POV/ I'm a boy. I like girls. Why can't it get in my head that Remus Lupin IS NOT a girl?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

Sirius' POV

I love girls.

Of course I do. I mean, I'm a boy and boys tend to like girls. I've been chasing after them ever since these stupid hormones actually kicked in. And since I'm 17… They surely have _kicked in_.

But then why in all the blazes of Azkaban do I feel so bloody _attracted _to my best friend?

No, I am not in love with Remus Lupin. I obviously am not. It's appalling and disturbing… And just completely wrong.

So why does a part of me think it's so wrong that he doesn't even love me back, or even _consider _loving me?

Wait a minute. Who even said I loved him? No one said anything!

This is just stupid. I can't like Remus… It's _Remus _for Merlin's sake. He's my best friend. He's a boy. He's fucking gorgeous…

I did NOT just say that.

"Sirius… You're talking to yourself," interrupted a voice, gently breaking my train of thought. I looked up and met a pair of amber gold eyes that twinkled in amusement. Oh, for the love of Merlin…

"Huh? What are you talking about, Remus?" I managed to reply, forcing on a grin. Remus frowned slightly, his brow wrinkling deeply in thought. Crap, maybe I smiled too wide. I always give it away like that.

"You smiled too wide."

Ha, I knew it.

"So, what's wrong with smiling too wide?" I questioned, puffing out my chest in defiance. "Is there a law against smiling past a certain extent? If there was, you should probably tell me about it—"

"Siri, I've known you for seven years and shared a dorm with you for six Christmases in a row. Of course I know your habits well enough," said Remus Lupin as a retort, a wry smile curling at his lips.

I eventually found myself staring at them, which was _definitely_ not the best thing to do at the moment. It was completely, absolutely, certainly, without question and undoubtedly wrong.

Yet why do I find it so wrong that my lips aren't against his?

Merlin's Beard, I'm going mad!

"Sirius!"

"I'm listening!" I blurted out, my eyes trailing towards Remus, who was giving me a strange look.

"Oh god, you're right, you are going mad." Remus rolled his eyes and looked back at his Transfiguration book.

I need to get out of here.

FAST.

I don't have a crush on him. That'd be insane. Why in hell would I like a boy? I AM a boy. Boys like girls. Not all, but they're supposed to! Besides… I am one of the most wanted boys in Hogwarts. All girls melt at my feet.

Yeah, that's it.

It's just sad that I don't want any of them.

Wait a goddamn second! I could want one of them! I've only dated half of them. They're only too flirty, too clingy, too apathetic, too insensitive… I just need to find the perfect one.

"Sirius, are you sure you're okay?" Remus offered me a soft smile that made my heart pump a bit faster than usual. Okay, this is lame and stupid. Remus is one of my best friends! Loving him would be declaring my insanity.

Then again, I'm talking to myself.

OH BLOODY HELL!

"Yeah, I'm fine, of course I'm okay, and why wouldn't I be?" I replied a bit too quickly for my own good. Remus raised his eyebrows and grinned. "Ah, I'm gonna go look for James, okay? You alright on your own?"

"Always," answered Remus with a wave of his hand. "It's easier to concentrate without you beside me."

And then both our cheeks turned slightly pink. The back of Remus' ears went slightly scarlet. I tried not to notice that as I stood up, grabbed my books and headed off to the library.

Damn it, I have to stop thinking and talking to myself.

Okay I'll stop now…

…

…

…

"Ah, fuck it!" I burst out loud, right in the corridor. A few first years stared at me before scurrying off. A fifth year raised her eyebrow at me before going off to the library. Stupid idiots, they don't even know what's going on.

Even I don't.

"Padfoot, wait up a second!" called out a familiar voice. Of course. James Potter jogged up to me and slung an arm around my shoulder. "God, Head Boy duties were starting to bore me."

"And now I see why Evans thinks you're a total ass," I responded teasingly as I continued walking off. "Don't you have anything better to do anyway, Potter?"

"No, that's the point. Listen, I've got to win Evans over by the Christmas Ball, which is in two weeks! _Two weeks, _Pads!" James ran a hand through his messy hair. "I haven't got much time."

"Here's a good start: Do your Head Boy duties." I smirked and continued walking, only to be pulled by James backwards. I crashed into a set of armor.

"Watch it!" the armor shrieked. It dusted itself off and remained in its natural position. I rolled my eyes at James and shrugged his grip off my arm.

"God, Potter, what do you want from me?"

"Something's up, and I know it's not your wand."

"Geez, Prongs, what the hell!" I shouted. "You've got to be joking me."

"Pads, we've been best friends since we were little hot babies. I can read you like an open book." James looked at me in concern, and I already knew that it was something serious. Despite the playful tone in his voice, he was nothing but teasing when he stared at me.

"It's nothing big, James."

"Seeing you hold a book and go to the library is something big, Sirius. Plus, you actually told me to do my Head Boy duties, and you called me James, which you haven't called me in four years, when we had that big misunderstanding about your sexuality."

I flushed scarlet. "I mean, I know you're not gay or anything," continued James. "You just don't know which Ravenclaw to date, that's all. Apparently, you have no good taste in house, either. You've dated half of Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff AND Slytherin, and still nobody. It's either you're REALLY gay or you just need a Gryffindor girl. Or you're intent on exploring your sexual horizons, which was definitely something that you'd do."

"James—"

"Of course you cannot be gay, that'd be just nasty, and what if you liked one of us or something? Sexual tension is just not fun in dormitories—"

"Prongs—"

"And besides, we'd all go weird on you. I never thought I'd be homophobic, perhaps that's why I was never really fond of Snape, but—"

"POTTER!"

That wasn't me. The redhead by the name of Lily Evans had a face as red as the curtains in our dormitories. James whipped around, the traditional smirk plastered on his lips. "Hey, Lily darling—"

"Do NOT call me that! Why in the name of heavens aren't you patrolling the rest of the corridors? Hell must've broken loose when you haven't patrolled! Rules could've been broken! D'you know—"

"That you are boring me?" interrupted James, raising an eyebrow. "You know, Evans, if you weren't so gorgeous, I'd actually not think you existed."

Now I bet Evans was mad. Pursing her lips together, her face turned a shade of tomato red. She whipped around and marched off. Right after, of course, I thwacked James Scott Potter on the head. "You definitely need to do something aside from playing Keeper all the time," I warned. "You're becoming dafter by the second."

James shot me a dirty look before tapping my back slowly, something he usually did before finishing a conversation. "Well, whatever or whoever's bothering you, you better go talk to him. You're turning into a saint, and it's quite unlike you."

Hmm, talk to my baffled hormones. Maybe they prefer to listen to a higher authority.

-

**A/N: Amazingly, I have resurrected this and am doing a massive reconstruction of 'Call Me Crazy.' Hopefully, I'll be able to clear out the dusty, cobwebbed plot and finish it! YAY ME!**

**Please review, and add some comments. :D**** Love you all!**

** Less than 3, Padfooted**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Remus' POV

Just a reminder to everyone who must've forgotten, Remus Lupin is _not_ a morning person. I will ignore the fact that everyone thinks that I look forward to a new school day. I don't. I hate the fact that classes start at promptly eight thirty in the morning, and I hate that I have this… this _thing_ for punctuality. It just meant that I had to wake up on my own time—to manage to keep a cheerful disposition in front of my peers.

I have taken upon myself the responsibility to constantly remind my roommates that if I was awoken at a very ungodly hour, dire consequences shall be placed upon them. But, I have also forgotten the fact that my roommates never forget to forget any reminder—including the fact that I am not happy until around half past noon.

Hence, I had to face my own penalty of dealing with such horrible best friends, especially with such a best friend named James Potter, who found it, well, _necessary_ to wake all of us up at the bloody blasphemous hour of quarter past six this morning.

"Boys, it's time!" yelled a dramatic voice, rapping some annoying steel object against his trunk. "Come on, everyone! Get your lazy arses up!"

"Go fuck yourself, Potter, and let us sleep!" I heard Sirius yell, followed by a swish of curtains and a big yet soft thwack.

"Siri," whined James in this annoyingly high-pitched tone that did _not_ sound pleasant. "Siri, today's the day I will finally win Lily Evans over."

"Alright, since it is apparent that you're still dreaming, can't we all dream as well and get back to _fucking _bed?" I grumbled loudly enough for James to hear, rolling over and burying my head under the pillow. I heard soft, padded footsteps, before feeling the curtains to my four-poster bed swish open.

"Why must you be so pessimistic about Lily's hidden affections for me, Rem?" questioned James sadly, and I fought the urge to roll my eyes. "It's so obvious she's mad about me, too. Why can't she and the rest of the banshee-forsaken male population of this school see that?"

"Because, James, it is a vision only _you_ can see. And looking at your vision, well, it's not exactly in tip-top shape," I retorted. "Now get your sorry ass out of here before I put you in a Full Body Bind."

"A Full Body Bind, Moony? Give me a break," scoffed James.

"Would you rather I transfigure you into an ant, perhaps, and have Peter step on you? I don't want to say it again, Prongs, but _I NEED MY FUCKING SLEEP!_" With finality, I swished the curtains to my bed closed. After five seconds, the stupid boy swished it open again. I glared up at him through half-asleep eyes. "What?"

"Well, aren't you grumpy in the morning," he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest like a child. I growled under my breath, sitting up and hitting him with my pillow.

"How many times do I have to tell you that—?"

"Remus has to be woken up in his own time so he may show a cheerful disposition to his peers," Sirius called out to interrupt me, shuffling out of his bed and trudging over to his trunk. Seeing that I myself couldn't sleep anymore, I followed suit.

It was only then I noticed how toned Sirius had become over the years.

His biceps flexed slightly with movement when he heaved his trunk open, and the toned muscles on his back stared right at me as he bent over to grab some clothes. I bit back a gulp, watching his stomach ripple while he stood up. Once he saw me staring though, he smirked slightly and winked at me. I flushed bright red.

Geez, it wasn't as if I was checking him out or anything. You can't blame a guy for wanting to be just as toned as his best friend, right? "Like what you see, Moony?" Sirius called over his shoulder, his shoulder-length black hair swishing against his back.

"Fuck off." I grabbed my own clothes hastily and walked past him to the shower. Over the steady sound of the water rushing from the showerhead, I could already hear James berating Peter for not waking up along with us.

-

"He is insufferable, annoying and absolutely despicable!" The door to the Prefects' office burst open, and a fiery redhead stormed in with her two friends in tow. Lily Evans was known for her grand entrances to the Prefects' office, fazing no one nowadays. I really wasn't surprised. "Remus, how can you stand him?"

"Because he takes some getting used to," I replied monotonously, turning the page of my Potions book neatly and not looking up. Lily let out a frustrated growl, flopping onto the armchair beside mine. Her best friend, Charlotte Fawcett curled up by her chair.

"He isn't so bad, Lily," Charlotte soothed, brushing strands of her strawberry blonde hair behind her ear. "You just refuse to take him out of your bad side."

"Well, if he wasn't such a git all the time, it would've honestly been easier for me to be civil," grumbled Lily, burying her face between her knees. Her other best friend, Portia Bones sighed, sitting on the armrest of Lily's chair.

"You really should try and give him a chance, Lily. Who knows, maybe we can go on a double date," she giggled. My head shot up curiously, raising an eyebrow. Charlotte rolled her eyes and picked up one of Lily's books. "I mean, after all, you and James, me and Sirius! Hey, maybe Charlie and Remus could come along too!"

"You're dating Sirius?" I blurted out. I couldn't help myself. How could Sirius not tell me about these things? Just because he's been going nuts lately doesn't mean I get to lose out on such bits of important information! Portia sent me an annoyed look. I never really liked this girl; I hope she knew that.

"Uh, not yet, but he's going to ask me soon." She confidently tossed her dark blonde hair behind her shoulder. "He's been wanting to, I can tell."

"I'm sure," I muttered, going back to my book.

"What's got your boxers in a bunch, Rem?" asked Charlotte, sending me a confused look. "You're not usually this angry."

"Just woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning." Unfortunately, I was wondering why this didn't seem to feel like the right answer.

-

**A/N: Okay, here's a quick chapter update! I'm busy with rehearsals, schoolwork and basically everything in general, so I don't know when the next update will be. But if you guys review, maybe I will make it sooner rather than later! ^_^**

**Keep yourselves posted. Please review?**

**Much Love,**

**Padfooted.**


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: Are there people still reading this? XD _

_I love you guys if you still do. I don't know. Maybe I'll update it every now and then. I shall finish this! I swear I will!_

_Thanks to everyone who still put up with me after three years. :( I'm determined to finish this. I swear. I fixed the plot and everything!

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**Chapter Three**

Sirius' POV

* * *

By the end of the day, I had brushed hands with Remus twice, gotten caught staring at him out of nowhere thrice and nearly fell off my seat when Evans's friend tried to squiggle between me and Remus at dinner. My emotions were torn between confused, giddy and completely irritated. The last bit was only because Prongs had officially gone mad, and Evans really _wasn't_ helping the situation.

"Shit!" yelled James, rubbing his now-reddening cheek. Evans haughtily crossed her arms over her chest, glaring at him with a glint in her eyes that could either be considered as triumph or plain anger. "What the hell was that for?!"

"Well, if you didn't _touch_ me, you wouldn't have gotten slapped!" Evans reasoned coolly, twirling a piece of her auburn hair around her finger. Most guys would find that sexy on her, seeing how dominant she was, but really, all I could think about was the way Remus threaded his fingers through his hair when he was frustrated—

"Well, if you weren't ignoring me, I wouldn't have touched you!" James shot back. From behind James I tilted my head slightly to look at Remus in amusement, but he wasn't meeting my eyes. Instead, he was subtly (well, it wasn't that subtle for me since I couldn't keep my bloody eyes off the boy) eyeing Evans's friend Portia Bones, that annoying girl who kept trying to sit between us. Did he actually _like_ this girl?

"Well, if you were actually a decent human being, I wouldn't have ignored you!" Evans burst out, saying it loud enough for the whole Gryffindor table to go silent. Maybe even other tables heard it; I saw Amos Diggory sniggering from the corner of my eye, and I'm sure that pissed James off more than he let on.

"You know, if you even gave me the time of day, I wouldn't be doing everything in my power trying to impress you," James finally mumbled, and even Remus and I looked up in surprise at that. Evans was staring at him slack-jawed, and the fire in her eyes started to fade away.

"What?" Evans's voice was meek and surprised. "But… why?"

"Damn it, Evans, if it's not obvious yet, I've liked you since I realized that girls didn't really have cooties," James pointed out, threading his fingers through his hair. I tilted my head towards Remus, my eyes clearly asking if this was for real. He inclined his head slightly and smiled, winking to indicate that maybe what James was doing was actually working.

"You know, he's not such a bad guy," I spoke up, and Evans's head snapped to look at me. "I'm serious! Hey, Potter's a really good friend when he tries."

"And he's pretty determined," Remus played along, tilting his head to brush his bangs away from his eyes. An adorable smile graced his features, and I had to fight every urge I had to just grab him and kiss him.

Oh god, I'm still fantasizing about my best friend? This isn't right.

"He's been trying for three years, hasn't he?" I said innocently, standing up and clapping James on the back. He was looking at us urgently, like there was this plan that we had talked about but we never told him about. Well – that really kinda _was_ the situation at hand, wasn't it? "Give him a chance, Evans."

"You'll never know until you try, Lily," added Remus, nodding his head in agreement. "Don't you agree, Charlie?"

"Yeah, I do, actually." The girl on his other side, Charlie Fawcett (really nice girl, I didn't even want to _try_ dating her because I just couldn't take it if I broke that girl's heart) beamed up at her best friend. "Please, Lily."

"Just one date." James finally found his voice, searching into her eyes pleadingly. "And if you don't like it," he actually gulped and closed his eyes, taking a shaky breath, "I'll let you go and leave you alone."

At this, Evans gasped slightly. The little group was silent, even if the whole Great Hall was bursting with different kinds of noises. "You're really serious about this, aren't you?" questioned Evans finally, looking into James's eyes. He nodded, rubbing the back of his neck slightly.

There was a long silence, the kind when everyone's pretty much doing an awkward thing. It was the kind when you watch a turtle flipped over, and he's just flailing his legs in the air trying to get up. It was an awkward turtle. Hah, awkward turtle. I actually chuckled a bit at that, but Remus shushed me up by clamping his hand gently over my mouth.

I stared at his hand in shock, and I could _not_ believe there was this urge to actually take a finger in my mouth and – well, I'm pretty graphic, but I'm sure that no one would honestly, _really_ want to know that.

"Fine," Evans said. She broke the silence that overcame the little group, and James even did a double-take to make sure he was hearing correctly. "Oh, don't give me that look, Potter. Yes, I'm agreeing to go on a date with you."

It was one of those rare moments when you knew James was truly, truly happy – it looked like he won the Quidditch cup with the way he was beaming so brightly at her. "You won't regret it, Ev – Lily, I promise." He actually scooped her up in a quick hug, before slapping my back proudly and dancing out of the Great Hall.

I stared at Evans, who was blushing slightly, to Charlie, who was letting out little, excited giggles, and finally to Remus, who glanced at me at that very moment. The smile on his face was absolutely breathtaking, and his amber eyes sparkled giddily at the fact that James had actually scored.

And screw me over, maybe this was the time I actually realized that I'd never seen anyone so beautiful before. And I was determined to make this beautiful, albeit male person _mine_.


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: I am so sorry, 'Call Me Crazy' fans, that I haven't updated this in ages. A lot of things got in the way, but now I am ready to say that I fixed the plot and I'm going to finish this thing!_

_Thanks, if ever, for your unconditional support? :( Please review!_

_

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**Chapter Four**

Remus's POV

* * *

Ever since James asked Lily out, things became sort of a blur – a surreal blur, I might add. Despite the fact that we were only a couple more days away from the Christmas Ball, Lily didn't seem to be panicking like she always was. On the contrary, she was like this little Christmas angel that got what she wanted for Christmas.

"Potter, what did you do?" I questioned harshly, shoving my roommate against the wall of the dormitory.

"What in the world are you talking about?" replied James in surprise, looking back at me with a hint of confusion on his face. It must've been such a sight to see anyway; my hair was all ruffled, my tie was messily undone and my sleeves were haggardly rolled up to my elbows.

"What am I talking about?" I shoved him higher. "What did you do to Lily Evans?"

"Is this a trick question?" asked James uneasily. "Because I really just took her out on a date. Is there something wrong?"

"Wrong?" I let him go and started pacing around the room. "We're a couple of days from the Christmas ball, yeah? Five days to be exact. _Five days_. And when Charlie and I ask her what to do, she just says, quite calmly I might add, 'It will all work out just fine, trust me.' Trust her? She's not even pulling a single hair out!"

"I think you should trust her on that one," he pointed out, straightening his shirt out and crossing his arms over his chest. "Lily Evans always has a plan."

"But she's usually so… freaked out about it!" I yelped. "Not seeing her freak out freaks _me_ out!"

"Well, maybe you shouldn't freak out then." James patted my back and headed for the bathroom. "You're starting to look really bad, Remy, and it's not good for your image."

I let out a growl, and my best friend simply let out a laugh as he entered the bathroom.

* * *

"Now, I've pretty much covered everything else," said Lily, pointing out her plans flawlessly on a piece of animated parchment during the Prefect's meeting. "I fixed the decorations and got the Ravenclaws to do that – they're bloody excellent with Charms, I must say – while the Hufflepuffs are in charge of the refreshments. Slytherin mans security, and Gryffindor is in charge of entertainment."

The rest of us stared at her in shock. Normal Lily would usually have her hair up in a messy bun, yelling at all of us to just get things done and things would eventually fall into place. Now, she looked calm and pretty satisfied with herself actually. Her hair was tied up in a neat ponytail, her hand gracefully moved over the animated illustration of the Great Hall as she discussed the more minute details, and everything seemed to be just peachy.

"Lily, are you… alright?" Charlie asked awkwardly, once Lily finally closed her mouth and caught her breath.

"Why yes, I'm fine," Lily replied, a bit startled. "But we really must get to work to have everything in ship-shape. James is already handling most of the other preparations for the Christmas feast, so—"

"Wait a minute," Snape, the disgusting little sod who happened to be one of the Slytherin prefects, looked at Lily snidely, "you're saying that _Potter_ is actually doing work this time?"

"He volunteered to do it," Lily was almost as red as her hair now, "and I think that he just might be able to get the job done perfectly."

That pretty much explained everything, and Charlie and I shared an amused look. It was no wonder Lily's been an angel – her knight in shining armor finally stepped up.

After Lily adjourned the meeting, she pulled Charlie and me aside. "I expect you both to exceed my expectations," she said briskly, handing Charlie and me each a roll of parchment. "Have these done in three days, yes?"

With that, she walked away, her robes billowing gracefully behind her. "Thankfully, not everything about her has changed," muttered Charlie, and I murmured my agreement. She opened the parchment and scanned it slightly, her brow furrowing lightly. "Well, we just have to provide carols throughout the night. We also have to fix this whole Secret Santa thing per year. Everyone already pretty much has one. We just have to remind them about their presents."

I nodded in assent, glancing at Charlie as she spoke. Charlie was actually quite attractive, not that anybody seemed to notice it though. She had a pretty good personality as well; I wonder why I never really noticed it before.

_That's cause you were probably focusing on someone else. _

I scoffed inwardly. _Yeah, like who?_

When the voice in my head didn't respond, I managed to catch one of Charlie's other comments. "I can get the Wild Warlocks for the latter part of the ball," she noted, smiling at me in amusement when my mouth opened wide.

"No way, how?"

"My sister's boyfriend's actually one of the band members." Charlie shrugged. "It's not really that big of a deal, I can just ask for a small favor."

"That'd be great!" I grinned at her, and she managed a grin back. She linked arms with me as we walked out of the meeting room, heading towards the Great Hall for lunch. "Do you think James has done a good job on this one?"

"Oh, yes. I definitely do not miss the screaming." Charlie chuckled, nudging me lightly. "Do you miss him obsessing?"

"That hasn't changed, believe me." I escorted her into the Great Hall, where Portia sat waving with Sirius beside her. For some reason, Sirius looked like he swallowed something really bad, or he was forced to watch something he extremely disliked. Wonder what it was?

"So, you planning on taking anyone to the ball, or will you be too tired to entertain a date?" teased Charlie as she let go of my arm.

"I was actually planning on asking you." I looked at her and smiled. "Would you mind being my date to the Christmas ball, Charlotte?"

"I certainly don't, Remus." She tucked her hair behind her ear and patted my arm, before moving to sit across from Portia. "Looks like I have a date to the ball, Portia."

However, I didn't feel like celebrating much. For some reason, the way Sirius was looking at me made me feel like I had just made an extremely wrong decision.


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: Chapter five in less than a year, I must say it's an achievement._

_Your reviews keep me going. I daresay you should click that little button and type in what you think! I accept constructive criticism, if phrased in the proper manner._

_I don't remember who you are, since I can't check the review because my Internet fails (T_T), but please don't pre-empt me when it comes to the story. Just sit and wait, and I assure you, if the time comes that Remus does run away, you have a right to yell at me, but in the mean time I'm sorry, you can't tell me how my story should go. I appreciate the thought, and yes, Remus won't do anything stupid. Yet. (At least, not the stupid you don't like.) But thank you though!_

_Long author's note… T_T_

_

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**Chapter Five**

Sirius's POV

* * *

I felt like a Bludger just hit me.

Well, a Bludger, given my excellent Flying and Beating skills, has never exactly hit me but that's not the point here.

The point is all those signals Remus has been giving me for the past I-don't-exactly-know-how-long was a lie. Yes, it was a lie, because he asked out Charlie Fawcett to the Christmas ball.

_What did you expect him to do, go stag?_

No, that's what I expected James to do, ha-ha –

_That was a lame pun, and you know it. Stop trying to mask your pain with humor._

Well, what else was I supposed to do, weep in front of him and admit everything to him? What if I didn't really feel anything for him either? What if everything I felt for Remus was also just some twisted reaction of my hormones, because I haven't exactly been shagging anyone for a long time?

_Are you seriously going to walk this path?_

I don't even know why I'm talking to myself, or at least another part of myself! I think every bit of my brain and my heart are united in saying that whatever I felt for Remus was a result of my lack of orgasms for the past few months. The sperm had nowhere else to go but up!

"That's disgusting, you know," said a voice in amusement. I didn't even know I said it aloud. I felt my cheeks heat up, watching James enter the room and cross towards his four-poster bed. He flopped down on it and folded his arms behind his head. "Got a problem, Padfoot?"

"None at all!" I flashed him my teeth, but obviously again I wasn't quite convincing enough. James frowned.

"You smiled too wide."

How many times has this happened?

"I'll have you know that I like smiling," I snapped, lying down on my own bed and staring up at the deep scarlet of my curtains. "I like smiling so much, that I end up smiling too much."

"Whoever's got you in such a bad mood has apparently stolen your wit as well," scoffed James. "You can't even lie properly."

"I can _too_ lie properly! Remember that time that we convinced that Hufflepuff that if he transfigured his cloak into feathers, he could fly?"

"Almost got us into big trouble that time; I've never seen Minnie so furious." James chuckled, and I did as well. A moment of comfortable silence passed through us, and I looked back on all those times the Marauders could do anything without having a ton of awkward sexual tension thick enough to slice with a knife. Maybe it would also be best for us if I denied ever liking Remus.

Hell, I wouldn't be denying it because it's true.

_James was right. You couldn't lie properly to save your life._

_

* * *

_

I was piling tons of bacon on my plate when I saw Remus walk in with Charlie and Portia the next day. I felt a slight pang in my chest, but I chose to ignore it. It was probably because I was so hungry, the pain shot all the way up there.

_Liar._

Shut up.

"Good morning, guys!" said Charlie cheerfully, sitting across me. Remus sat beside her, shooting Portia a slightly disgusted look when she slid onto my lap. Well, it shouldn't matter to him whether she sits on my lap or not!

_You are such a _girl.

I am not!

"Morning," I replied gruffly, stuffing some bacon into my mouth. Remus sniggered slightly, and I shot him a glare. He backed off immediately.

"So, the ball's in four days, Sirius," flirted Portia. She looked up at me from behind her eyelashes, batting them coyly. I was disgusted, but I wasn't allowed to show her that. Remus started to shove eggs onto his plate.

"Yeah," I said slowly. I carefully wrapped an arm around her, grabbing my goblet with my other hand. Remus stabbed a breakfast sausage with his fork, while Charlie curiously glanced between Remus, Portia and me.

"Well… Do you have a date?" Portia pressed on.

"Not yet, no. I'm sure I could get one last minute."

"Oh, me too." She flipped her hair over her shoulder, hitting my face in the process. I coughed awkwardly, gritting my teeth slightly in the process. This girl was such an idiot.

Remus was obviously affected by it; I heard the distinctive low growl in his throat as he piled more food onto his plate. "Gee, Remus, save some for the rest of Gryffindor," teased Charlie, nudging him. He grunted.

I wanted to shove this girl off my lap and just pull _him_ into my arms instead –

_Thought you said he didn't like you._

But he's obviously jealous, which erases any aforementioned –

_I thought you said this was all a phase. Isn't this maybe just your twisted hormones trying to get a shag? And didn't you say that leaving Remus alone was better for everyone?_

Whose side are you on?

_Oh, bless me. I thought your brain and your heart were united on this one._

"Sirius? Hello?" Portia looked at me, the flirtatiousness long gone. "Are you going to ask me to the ball or what?"

Remus was looking at me intently, his eyes burning with an emotion I couldn't place. What was it to him, anyway? He asked _Charlie _out first. He never even said he was gay! What was I doing waiting around for someone who would probably just not love me back? And besides, how sure was _I_ that I was really gay?

_Why do you keep asking yourself all these questions?_

Because – because I _need_ the answers. I'm going crazy here!

"I thought I didn't need to ask. I already assumed that from the previous statements that we were going together," I said smoothly, gracefully removing her off my lap. I gulped down my orange juice and smirked arrogantly at the three of them. "I'll see you guys later. I have to find James."

"He's probably with Lily," Remus said, shooting me a look. His face looked pretty wounded, like someone ran over his foot. I didn't exactly care at this point. He probably didn't care either.

_You're a really, really bad liar, Sirius._


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: Sorry. It's been difficult. But it's here, isn't it?_

_

* * *

_

**Chapter Six**

Remus' POV

* * *

The Christmas ball was nothing short of _amazing_.

I entered the Great Hall while waiting anxiously for Charlie, and my nerves immediately went away when I saw the decorations. Candles frozen in levitating ice crystals and transfigured lamp posts adorned the room and casted a bright light over the winter wonderland. The Ravenclaw prefects charmed the ceiling, letting snowflakes fall gracefully over the area. Charlie and I did an awesome job with the entertainment as well, I must say – snowmen and enlarged toy soldiers danced around the room, even with some of the students who were having a good laugh. An old record player belted out jazzy Christmas songs, which some students were already dancing to with glasses of pumpkin juice in their hands.

All in all, I thought everyone was having a good time. And when everything was going smoothly, that meant Lily and James were both quite happy.

"Don't you look dashing," said a voice from behind me, and I turned around to smile broadly at my date. Charlie looked gorgeous; she was clad in a white Muggle gown that ballooned past her waist and reached her knees. Her strawberry blonde hair was styled in an up-do, pulled back by a crystal clip. Tendrils framed her heart-shaped face, and I couldn't help but pull her into my arms when she beamed at me.

"You've outdone yourself this time, Miss Fawcett," I replied with a chuckle, twirling her around. "You are definitely going to attract the best men here."

Charlie winked at me and linked my arm through hers. I escorted her towards one of the tables, scanning the room for my three best friends. Peter was obviously by the refreshment table, nibbling on cheese like the amusing little rat he is. Somehow, I couldn't find James or Sirius. "The place looks remarkable," said Charlie, settling down on a seat and looking up at the ceiling in awe. "It's like we're in a fantasy wonderland."

"Have you seen James or Sirius anywhere?" I questioned distractedly, sitting down as well. I had completely forgotten about the full moon coming up, and my head was starting to ache from the acuteness of my ears. My eyes had practically zoned over the room, and I still hadn't found them. "Bloody hell, it's quite loud in here, isn't it?"

"Not really." Charlie looked at me in confusion, before twisting her head around to look around the room. "Oh, I see James… with Lily!"

I snapped my head around to where Charlie was looking, and surely enough James Potter and Lily Evans were engaged in a conversation. They looked beautiful in matching black robes, and I could have sworn that Lily's cheeks were flushed – and it wasn't because of the weather, I could tell you that. "This ball is doing wonders, isn't it?" I mused. I turned to smile at Charlie. She nodded thoughtfully, resting her chin on her palm.

"I wonder where Portia went," she answered. "I left the dorms before she did, so I don't know if she's here or not. Isn't Sirius her date?"

For some reason, my throat tightened. I adjusted my tie slowly, threading my fingers slowly through my hair. "Uh, I don't know. I haven't seen Sirius either. Been looking for him since a while ago."

Charlie laughed, placing a hand on mine. "I was surprised. Knowing the two of you, you would have gone down together. You are both attached at the hip. If I knew any better, I suppose you would have asked _him_ to go to the ball instead of me."

"Nonsense, Charlie, he's a boy." _Where the hell did that come from?_

"And so? If you did happen to be gay, Remus, I wouldn't mind if it were Sirius." Charlie smirked at me. "But enough of all this joking, would you like to enjoy this ball and dance with me?"

I let out a forced laugh and stood up, outstretching my hand. "I'd be delighted, Miss Fawcett." Her words had distracted me. Would she really accept me if I were gay? And an even better question, would _Sirius_ actually be gay to like someone like me?

That was definitely nonsense. Sirius was one of the straightest men I knew. He most likely had sexual intercourse with half the women here at Hogwarts, and he was quite the flirt. Sure, he was intelligent, charming, and incredibly attractive –

I should probably stop this train of thought. This was my best friend I was thinking about. He would most definitely hate me if I was gay. I mean, being a werewolf was enough, but a _gay_ werewolf? Besides, I wasn't even so sure if I was gay, never even fancied the thought –

"Oh, there they are!" Charlie tilted her head and waved towards the entrance, and I followed her gaze to look at Portia and Sirius. My breath caught slightly in my throat.

Sirius looked _beautiful_. His slightly long hair was pulled back into a low ponytail, and he actually shaved the stubble on his chin. His lips were curled slightly upward in an obviously bored smirk, and his stormy grey eyes scanned the room until they met mine. And if it really wasn't my imagination, his cheeks flushed slightly pink, and his lips parted slightly.

I felt extremely self-conscious. "Let's go say hi," persisted Charlie, tugging at my hand and dragging me away from the dance floor. I stumbled slightly on my feet, and my eyes immediately darted over to Sirius. He grinned slightly in amusement, inclining his head at me. I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment, and I fiddled with the hem of my dress robes until the couple, Charlie and I were finally within talking proximity. "You two look good together."

"Quite a match, if I say so myself," said Portia arrogantly, and the two girls began to chat as if they weren't roommates for the past six years of their lives. I chuckled slightly and awkwardly met Sirius's eyes. His own were freely roaming over my form, and I didn't know it was possible to blush even harder.

"You look good," I managed to say, trying to break the silence between Sirius and me. He shrugged casually.

"Since when did I not, eh?" he joked. I rolled my eyes at him, and an awkward silence overcame us once more. "So, how've you been? Feels like it's been ages, hasn't it?"

His tone seemed mildly distant, and it bothered me. "Yeah, it feels like it. I've missed you," I admitted. My eyes widened immediately afterward, surprised that something like that actually escaped my mouth. Sirius raised an eyebrow in amusement, but he seemed obviously pleased with the way his lips quirked upward.

"I've missed you, too." He leaned over and moved his lips close to my ear. "How you feeling? The full moon's coming up soon."

"You know how it is," I managed to reply. I suddenly felt all hot and bothered with Sirius leaning so close to me. My senses were tingling really strongly; I smelled soap, water and just the essence of Sirius all over me. It was overwhelming, and it tingled in areas where – well, where it really was not supposed to tingle.

I hated my hormones.

"Let's dance, Sirius." Portia tugged at Sirius's hand, and I smiled wryly as Sirius pulled away from me. As Portia dragged him to the dance floor, he waved his hands at me wildly to save him. I let out a laugh and waved a hand dismissively at him. Gesturing obscenely at me, Sirius turned around and let Portia throw herself at him. It was disgusting, but also extremely amusing.

"Well, Portia seems to be into him," said Charlie lightly, and I let out a laugh at how amusing this all really was.

* * *

The rest of the ball was pretty much a blur. Charlie and I spent half of it dancing away with our enchanted snowmen, toy soldiers and even Lily and James, and then spent the other half sitting down and talking. Turns out that Charlie and I had a lot more in common than I thought – she was scared of the moon, of course for different reasons. Her brother used to joke that the monster under her bed fed on the moon's rays to become stronger, and a shiver still runs up her spine from the thought. Funny how in some cases, the situation actually implied that I was a monster in that sense. The wolf in me fed off the rays of the moon to become stronger – and it hurt, knowing that it was true.

Portia had amusingly convinced Sirius to dance almost all night, so when Sirius approached Charlie and me at the table he was exhausted. "It's like the woman can't bloody stop," he groaned, collapsing beside me on a chair.

"Funny, thought that was how you liked your women," commented Charlie, and I let out a laugh. Sirius looked up wearily from his arms and cast a glare at my direction. I winked at him lightly, and even if he kept frowning, he seemed more relaxed.

"It's exhausting. She's still out there!" Sirius pointed to the dance floor, where Portia was dancing with a couple of Hufflepuff girls who went together as a group. "It's crazy!"

"It's quite hilarious, actually." I patted Sirius on the back, and he responded by pulling my hand closer and lacing our fingers together. He crossed his arms and rested his head between them, leaving me to awkwardly dangle my arm near him. I felt myself turn red, and Charlie winked at me in response, mouthing '_cute couple_' at me. I rolled my eyes at her in response.

Sirius's hand felt good against mine, especially with his fingers laced together like that. As weird as it sounded, it felt like it was meant to be that way – his larger hand covering mine, entwining his smooth fingers with my calloused, rough ones. It was awkward, but it actually felt really nice. I felt myself shiver slightly in response.

This was ridiculous. Really.

"It's time for the last dance!" said Lily from the Professor's table, and Charlie and I watched her get swept away by James onto the dance floor. I smiled in content, watching James bow to Lily like any proper gentleman should. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and they began to dance.

"They look beautiful together," said Charlie softly. I murmured my agreement, before standing up and gesturing my hand to her. She giggled and took my hand, before we left Sirius fast asleep on the table. It didn't take long before he was back out there with Portia, who immediately pressed her body up against his for the slow dance.

I laughed and bowed to Charlie, who took my hand and started waltzing with me around the place. "I had fun tonight," she said, sliding her arms around my neck. I grinned and nodded my head in amusement. "You weren't as boring as I thought you were."

"I resent that!" I complained. She grinned and winked playfully at me, before kissing my cheek and resting her head on my shoulder. I sighed and looked up, spotting Sirius just nearby. His eyes met mine, and I felt like I couldn't look away. Although he was dancing with someone else, his eyes were trained onto me, as if he was memorizing my form, my face and the scars that damaged it. He bit his lip lightly, before shooting me a slow half-smile.

And that's when I knew – I think I like my best friend. That goddamn smile drove me crazy, and when Charlie leaned up to kiss me, I didn't feel a thing.


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: Because I'm still sorry. Thank you for staying – well, if you did stay. Love me?_

* * *

**Chapter Seven**

Remus' POV

* * *

I pulled away almost immediately, glancing down at Charlie with both guilt and confusion in my eyes. I adored Charlie; she was a brilliant Prefect and an amazing friend. But of course, when you realize that you sort of have romantic feelings for your _male_ best friend, things change and obviously kissing Charlie wasn't the first thing I wanted to do. I may sound like I'm rambling in my mind, but I can't seem to help it because bloody hell, _Charlie kissed me_ – "Charlie, I –"

"Don't worry," said Charlie with a shudder, "I didn't feel a _thing_."

I bit my lip slightly and looked down at her, while she grinned sheepishly up at me in response. There was no denying that Charlotte Fawcett was gorgeous in her own way, but just the fact that she's not – hell, that she's not Sirius –

Oh fuck, speaking of Sirius –

I looked up towards the last place that I saw Sirius and Portia dancing, but they were already gone. "Shit," I cursed, gripping onto Charlie. "You think Sirius saw that? The kiss, I mean. I hope he doesn't think it meant anything –"

"Why would he care?" questioned Charlie, raising an eyebrow. I looked at her worriedly, before bowing gracefully and stepping out of her arms. "Remus, where are you going?"

"I need to find Sirius," I said urgently, kissing her cheek. "You were a brilliant date, Charlie, but I really have to go."

It didn't take too long for Charlie to realize the implications of my departure, but I knew that she understood the moment I left the dance floor in search of Sirius.

I didn't understand why it didn't come off as more of a shock to realize that I had feelings for him. Shouldn't I be undergoing an extreme identity crisis knowing that – well, knowing that I'm gay? Well, of course, I've already grown up with lycanthropy, as if I didn't have enough shit to deal with already, and now that I'm bloody well _gay_ for my best friend…

I should really stop rambling. It's unbecoming.

_You're panicking, Lupin. You're sort of allowed to be unbecoming every once in a while._

Ah, bloody hell, I thought you've left.

_I'm in your head, you idiot. I never leave. Now find Sirius Black before it's too late to undo the damage!_

At least, I'm praying there's no damage to begin with.

I searched throughout the corridors of the first floor and all over the empty classrooms, but I couldn't find him. I ran up to our dormitories to grab the map. "I solemnly swear I am up to no good!" I hissed, muttering _Lumos_ under my breath to light up the map. I saw James leading Lily out of the Great Hall towards the stairs, while bunches of insignificant dots parted to their respective dormitories. "Damn it, Sirius, where are you?"

That was when I saw his name – up in the Astronomy Tower, with Portia Bones.

And it hit me like a ton of bricks. Yes, I did like him. But obviously, why would he like someone like me? A crazy, rambling, _male_ werewolf?

As if I didn't have enough shit to deal with already.

* * *

I barely got any sleep that night, especially when I heard Sirius come traipsing in early in the morning. I pretended that I was asleep, but all night my mind and the wolf were battling it out. I tossed and I turned, but nothing could soothe me.

It was probably bloody idiotic of me to think that Sirius could feel the same way. Indeed, we were friends – the best of friends, as a matter of fact. Sirius was the shaggy black dog that wrestled with the wolf and licked his wounds clean. Sirius was the funniest of the four of us, and he was also clearly the most attractive one.

He's also notoriously horny, which clearly implies that he's only into girls.

_That's messed up logic._

Shut up.

"Good morning!" said James happily, and I barely even slept a wink. I tilted my head to look at the sun slowly streaming into the windows. It must have been around half past six. I never understood James' body clock, but it didn't matter. "I would just like to say that last night was the _best_ night of my life."

"Good for you," I mumbled, sitting up.

"Christ, Remus! You look like shit."

"Thanks, I get that often." I rolled my eyes and crawled off my bed, wanting to get changed. I scrounged through my trunk for a decent uniform, my head pounding every second.

"Can't I at least tell you about my night?" whined James, plopping on my bed and looking at me. "Please, please, _please_ –"

"Can't I at least take a shower first and get a cup of coffee?" I replied irritably, tossing my tie over my shoulder. James tugged at my tie and shimmied playfully at me, his smile growing wider and stupider by the second. He obviously wasn't going to let me go. "Fine, Potter. Go and tell me every cheesy, disgusting detail."

"I _knew_ you loved me, Moony!"

"Oh, just shut up and tell me already," I half-joked, moving to shove him off my bed. "I did see you two looking pretty cozy at the party, James, so hats off to you. If you hurt her, I will see to it myself that you're beaten up."

"You know I wouldn't hurt her," said James seriously, looking me in the eye. He paused thoughtfully and continued. "I may seem like an arse most of the time," and really that was an understatement, "but I do have real feelings for Lily. Mate, I think – I think I'm in love with her."

Well, that's a surprise.

"You only noticed that now?" I ran a hand through my hair.

"Well, how could I have noticed it? I was too busy trying to impress her and sort things out with Sirius. Lord knows _he's_ got himself into a bit of trouble with that Portia Bones, whom I haven't heard of since last night." James shrugged. "But seriously, Remus – have you ever been in love?"

Yes – with the man fast asleep on the next bed.

"Unfortunately, James, I haven't," I noted sourly, lying straight through my gritted teeth.

"Oh, it's _wonderful_, Moony," swooned James, wrapping an arm around me. "The stars are finally aligned! The sun seems to shine brighter, and the grass is much greener –"

"You sicken even more people?" I suggested, and James shot me a glare. "Only joking, mate, but I get where this is going."

"I don't know, Moony," he breathed, "but everything just feels _right_, you know?"

"I'm happy for you." And I did mean it. James had been pining after Lily for years, probably ever since the beginning of fifth year when she yelled at him for being such an insufferable prat. It was the first time he ever really _saw_ her, I suppose – and that triggered a series of pranks, followed by another annoying way to ask her out. I don't know how he managed to really fall for her on the way, but he did.

"We had such a great conversation last night." James sighed happily. "It was one of those times I actually wasn't trying to please her, you know? I didn't know you could have that with a girl, mate."

"Apparently, you could." I patted James's back gently. "And like I said Prongs, I am really happy for you."

"Thanks, Remus. That means a lot."

"Can I go shower now?"

"Yeah, mate, you smell like shit," he joked, and I shoved him off my bed before retreating to the shower.

* * *

"Look at them, Remus!" cooed Charlie over breakfast. I looked up from my plate to see James and Lily entering the Great Hall together, their fingers linked. To my surprise, James didn't swagger in like I thought he would, seeing as he finally got the girl of his dreams. Instead, he was talking to her animatedly, like they had been a couple for the past seven years. Lily looked the same, laughing at what he was telling her.

"Now _that_ is not something I thought I'd see in a million years," I agreed. We grinned at each other and watched them make their way towards us.

"Good morning, Lily, James," said Charlie formally, winking at me from the corner of her eye. It seemed like they got out of a trance then, and James awkwardly cleared his throat before releasing Lily's hand and sitting across me.

"Morning, Charlie, Remus," replied Lily good-naturedly, nodding her head at me as she sat across Charlie. "Congratulations on the ball last night. The entertainment was a huge success. I commend you both for jobs well done."

"Congratulations to you too, if you know what I mean," I said casually, and Charlie burst into laughter. Lily and James both turned beet red. "Oh come off it, you two, we're happy for you both."

"Thanks mate." James smiled gratefully at me, and I winked at him in return. "Hey, where's Sirius?"

"He came in early this morning," I said with a shrug, looking down at my plate. "I doubt he'll reach breakfast today."

"Funny, Portia came in early this morning too. She was practically dancing all over the room," said Lily, spooning some eggs onto her plate.

"I guess you know what that means," said James with a laugh, reaching out to slap me a high-five. I responded half-heartedly, my heart pounding in my chest. I think the universe was really planning on torturing me today.

"I think I'm going to go ahead. Got things to do," I said abruptly, scooping up the remains of my breakfast on my plate. "I'll see you all later."

"Why are you in such a rush, Moony?" James looked confused.

"Yeah, anything wrong?" Charlie eyed me curiously. I shook my head and slung my bag over my shoulder. It would have been much easier to say, '_Yes, I'm madly in love with my best friend who has _no_ interest in me whatsoever, and of course we're talking about him having sex with one of _your_ best friends –'_

"Hey Remus, where are you going?" Speak of the bloody devil himself. I hadn't noticed him come in, with Portia Bones throwing herself at him no less. I hated it when he stared at me; it was like he was focused on me and me alone, which obviously wasn't the case seeing as his arm was draped lazily over this slag's shoulders like he owned her.

"Somewhere else," I mumbled under my breath, nodding at everyone. "I'll see you."

"Remus, wait!" called out Sirius as I walked away. I only chose to walk faster, biting my lip and running towards the Great Hall entrance. "Remus!"

Sometimes, it's really better to just walk away.


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: Hi?_

_Follow me on Twitter and Tumblr! Links are up in my profile._

_XOXO_

* * *

**Chapter Eight**

Charlie's POV

* * *

Sometimes, I think boys are really daft.

They think you don't know anything, when in fact you see everything. And, when you point out the obvious, they pretend to act oblivious and say that there's nothing wrong. And yes, this has Remus Lupin written all over it.

It doesn't seem like it, but I know Remus very well. We've been working together in the same classes ever since First Year. Sure, he disappears every now and then, but he never fails to make up for it. And I honestly find it hilarious that he hasn't noticed his homosexuality until now, obviously when he just walked out the moment Sirius and Portia entered the room. And the look on Black's face when he left – well, obviously he was too afraid to make a move.

There are moments in life when you contemplate an intervention – something that will save your friends before they fall completely into that downward spiral to hell. And I'm not an expert at it, but I'm sure as all hell planning that intervention right as we speak. These two are getting absolutely ridiculous, and you'd think this wouldn't be such a problem because they were the smartest boys in class.

"Lily, can I talk to you and James for a sec?" I asked lightly. "It's about – er, Prefect matters."

"Sure, shoot," said James, a slight frown on his face as he ran a hand through his hair. Sirius and Portia tilted their heads to listen, which made things more difficult.

"Uh, can we talk in private?" The annoyed look on Portia's face was priceless. She let out a huff under her breath, before going back to pampering Sirius, who was too distracted by Remus's departure to even giving her much attention. Lily and James glanced at each other, before looking back at me and nodding. We stood up from the table and quickly exited the Great Hall.

"I think your friends are in love with each other," I blurted out, the moment we found a small alcove to talk.

"Sirius and Portia? Are you mad?" said Lily with a laugh. "By the looks of it, Sirius is barely even giving her the time of day. She'll be out by the end of the week, I assure you."

"Not Sirius and Portia." I rubbed my temples and closed my eyes. "Sirius and _Remus_."

James gaped at me as if I grew two heads. "My two best friends? In love with each other? Charlie, are you nursing a massive hangover today or what?"

"I'm serious!" I paced back and forth between them. "I know it seems weird, but I really think they're into each other. And I don't think it'll be all bad! The sexual tension is driving me nuts."

Lily reached out to stop me from pacing. "Charlie, I know you've been carrying a torch for Remus for as long as I can remember. I think you need an intervention."

It was my turn to gape at her. Was she being serious here? Okay, I admit that I had a little crush on Remus, back when we were younger, but honestly, he and I had grown to love each other like brother and sister. And I know I kissed him at the Ball, but that was the least of our worries now, isn't it? "I was thinking of giving _them _an intervention. Lily, James, do you see the way they've been acting around each other lately? Sirius and Portia enter the Great Hall, and Remus leaves like a jealous mistress! And c'mon, don't you think that they steal glances at each other a little too much?"

"Charlie, I love you and all, but don't you think I'd know if my best friends were gay?" laughed James, slinging an arm around Lily's shoulder. "Sirius fucks anything that _moves_, really –"

"Call me crazy, but I think there's something there that wasn't there before." I crossed my arms over my chest. "Look at how they act together and see what I mean."

And yes, I am quite embarrassed to say, I pulled a Remus and stormed out of the alcove before Lily or James could say anything more.

* * *

The rest of the day, I watched Sirius and Remus. It seemed a bit psychotic, I know, but the more I saw them together, the more apparent it really was. Sirius looks at Remus with these adorable puppy dog eyes; he's so smitten with the boy but Remus can't even look at him when both he and Portia are in the room. The poor, tormented look in Remus's eyes is quite unbearable to look at.

I learned to observe Lily and James as well. Lily's eyes darted easily from boy to boy, and the slow recognition that lights up her face was enough affirmation for me to know that she knew what I was talking about. I told you I wasn't nuts! Sirius always had an excuse to touch Remus, whether it was to slide an arm around him as they walked and talked, or even bumping knees when they sat beside each other. Remus would have this look on his face, and he would be so torn between walking away from him and wanting to kiss him.

It was a bit more hilarious than it was adorable, really.

"Charlie, do you have notes from last week's History of Magic lesson?" questioned Remus the moment we stepped into the common room. "I seem to have misplaced mine."

The common room was bustling with people today, and from the corner of my eye, I saw Sirius and Portia on one armchair and Lily and James settled on the couch. James was surprisingly tutoring Lily on something, and I could see her frown of concentration and the way she bit her lip that she was having a difficult time. I felt Remus stiffen next to me. "I think I have them somewhere in my dorm room. Want me to go get it?"

"Yes, please. I would really appreciate it," he answered through gritted teeth.

"Charlie, wait up!" Lily stood from the couch and followed me up the stairs. Looking at the determined gleam in her eyes, I had a decent idea of what would happen next. We entered the dormitories, and I rummaged through my desk for my History of Magic notes. She sat on her bed. "We need an intervention."

I smiled widely. "_Now _we're talking."


End file.
